(Editor’s note: In the Postcard Review, members of the Pixelitis staff write small, easily digestible reviews big enough to ‘fit on a postcard’ – hence the title. It can be about the whole experience or just a small piece of the pie. No scores needed.)
When a game’s selling point is bad controls, does the irony actually pay off?
I’m still asking myself that question, though being that I’ve been playing this game for at least a poorly-controlled handful hours, I suppose I would say yes.
Surgeon Simulator 2013 opens brilliantly, indirectly telling you how to control your hand, which is either your greatest ally or worst enemy. The A, W, E and R keys control each of the hand’s fingers while the mouse controls the position of the hand and the space bar is the thumb. What you immediately discover is that this “surgeon” is barely capable of doing desk-work, nevermind the impending heart transplant.
Above anything else, the game is hilarious. Every organ transplant involves you clumsily removing vital body parts before haphazardly tossing in the replacement organ. Another doctor says “close enough” and that’s it.
If you really want to be a renegade, you can get the achievements for flipping off the patient or throwing the brain into the skull like a basketball.
The gameplay is fun in a visceral and sick way. That being said, I had a lot of trouble trying to find where to cut certain organs.
For me, the game truly shines when you begin operating in the back of a speeding ambulance. That’s where the game had me laughing the most and actually having fun.
You know, like real surgery.