The rush of adrenaline when defeating an enemy in the name of good is quite unlike any other. Strategizing, diving, hacking and slashing one’s way to a sure fire victory is definitely a way to bring about accomplishment.
But what if there was another way? A way to bring about the defeat of one’s foes without the hacking and the slashing? With finesse and carefully timed moves? I’m not talking about stealth games, but the time honored tradition of dance. The purposeful engagement of a step forward, a hip wiggle and the imminent demise of your enemy–all set to the rhythm of a musical melody.
Here we have our favorite dance scenes, melodic plot points in which characters booty shake and rhythmically move their way to victory. We carefully curated and picked scenes that sway videogame characters to freedom, success or just the sheer joy of insanity.
Take a seat and prepared to be wowed by cheesiness.
Brave Fencer Musashi: Dance or DIE
While not exactly a cutscene, this “boss battle” from Brave Fencer Musashi is without a doubt one of the most entertaining battles I’ve ever experienced.
Leader Force’s Topo is a typical parody of the cutesy pop icon, decked out in mouse ears and a tail. However, don’t let this adorable outer shell fool you, as she’d like nothing more than to see Musashi’s body impaled on a spike while her undeniably catchy music plays in the background. Unlike typical battles, Musashi never directly attacks Topo, rather relying on his rhythm by pushing the buttons on screen in the same order as Topo. This is a lot like playing Dance Dance Revolution with the controller rather than the dance pad.
However, instead of a charming announcer lamenting your inability to dance, if you mess up Topo’s groove you are rewarded with a whirlwind and a bed of deadly spikes to the face. If your memorization is sub-par, you’re going to have a bad time. If you prove triumphant in your dance moves, Topo will be vanquished and your dancing skills will be feared throughout the entirety of Allucaneet kingdom.
Don’t be surprised if you catch yourself humming the tune. It’s one of the catchiest melodies I’ve ever listened to, and it took me a full year to completely get it out of my head.
- Tom Farndon
The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask: Macarena of Time
It is a truth universally acknowledged that Majora’s Mask is a supremely creepy and weird game. The game’s sidequests up the weird factor, often pitting Link against the living dead, some unspeakable abomination or in one scenario: aliens.
But the game’s most infamous dance sequence (and if you count the dancing Re-Deads, there are quite a few of these) is Link’s journey to teach two pasty twins how to boogie. The Rosa Sisters’ theme music is unsettling enough as it is, but this is nothing compared to Kamaro, the ghostly dancer who boogies on top of a rock in the middle of the local canyon. After receiving his freaky mask, Link returns to Clock Town to reach the Rosa Sisters how to groove.
As Link and the Rosas do the vogue from hell, the lone soldier in the vicinity watches them.
He watches you while you dance.
- Maxwell Coviello
WarioWare Smooth Moves: The Wario Dance Company Ass Slap Extravaganza
There’s nothing quite like the strike of your own behind when instigated by your own hand.
That’s precisely what WarioWare: Smooth Moves for the Wii wanted me to do, and how could I say no? Using the “Umbrella” formation of my
Wii remote form baton, I followed the onscreen prompts of the four polygonal dancers in front of me. A slap to the side of the glutes was had, followed by some strutting-in-place, hip-swaying, pose-striking and more.
Not only did this dance routine bring me much joy, but it proved to be quite a sight to behold for all of my friends watching. They may have been chortling during the whole ordeal, but I took my Ass Slap Extravaganza very, very seriously.
- Patrick Kulikowski